Year In Review Part II

1. What did you do in 2005 that you'd never done before? Became a graduate student and a teacher

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year? I don't think I made any resolutions last year. I might make some this year

3. Did anyone close to you give birth? Nope

4. Did anyone close to you die? My dog Kara had to be put down :'o(

5. What countries did you visit? USA

6. What would you like to have in 2006 that you lacked in 2005? More organization with my time

7. What date from 2005 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? May 20th and it has to do with cat snot. That's all I'll say...

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? 4.0 GPA, YEAH BABY!

9. What was your biggest failure? Leaving my business

10. Did you suffer illness or injury? Yes, I had Costochondritis

11. What was the best thing you bought? Probably my G4 Powerbook

12. Whose behavior merited celebration? Huh...

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? My sister, but that's nothing new

14. Where did most of your money go? Powerbook, bills

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? Getting accepted to graduate school

16. What song will always remind you of 2005? The Killers - Mr. Brightside

17. Compared to this time last year, you are: So much happier

18. What do you wish you'd done more of? Spending time with people

19. What do you wish you'd done less of? Reading, writing, grading

20. How did you spend the holidays? At my Mom's place

22. Did you fall in love in 2005? Yes

23. How many one-night stands? None

24. What was your favorite TV program? Scrubs

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year? There is, but I have no right to hate them

26. What was the best book you read? I don't think I read any good books this year

27. What was your greatest musical discovery? That's a tough one, I'll have to think about it

28. What did you want and get? An iPod

30. What was your favorite film of this year? I haven't seen many movies this year, but I would have to say "Serenity"

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? I turned 23 and I was working at my store

32. What one thing would've made your year immeasurably more satisfying? Things turning out the way they should have

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2005? The lazy man

34. What kept you sane? Who says I'm sane?

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? Anne Hathaway

36. What political issue stirred you the most? The horrible response from Dumb-Ass In Chief George Bush dealing with the hurricane victims

37. Who did you miss? This girl I know

38. Who was the best new person you met? That's not fair, I met a lot of best new people

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2005. There is such a thing as fate

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:

"When you smile
With those eyes
Baby it's like
You place a finger on my heart
And your lips next to mine
Make me think that maybe heavens where you are"

Year In Review Part I

January: No blog yet

February: No Blog yet

March: First Post

April: Graduate School

May: Fate, Destiny, Or Whatever You Want To Call It

June: Just For You

July: A Special Post

August: OVERLOAD

September: Vanilla Sky / Hot Photo TA

October: I Can't Sleep

November: Questions With No Answers / Costochondritis

December: My Dreams Really Are Cruel

For the Seafood Lover In You

Pay no attention to the title, it's the last thing I heard... that's why it's there.

Christmas is over and it was fun. I got a handful of gifts including movies, kitchen accessories, and a few other odds and ends.

Today is the day after Christmas and I have things to do, or at least, things I want to get done. I need to do laundry, do a little post-semester writing, and run several other errands. But before all that, I need to shower.

This isn't an interesting post, I'm afraid to say. Things have been pretty uneventful lately since the semester has ended and probably won't pick up until school starts up again. Who thought school would be the thing that brings interest to my life?

Oh well, happy holidays!

www.danrhine.com

My website is finally working again, BUT... I think I'm going to redesign it yet again. After careful thought, I want to keep my blog and my website separate. So, my blog is going to stay here, and my website is going to be more of a professional resume/portfolio type site. That is one of my goals this break.

Wish me luck...

Top 10 Photoshop Tutorials of 2005

A top10 list with some of the best Photoshop tutorials of 2005.

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Yep, It's Another One

1. Last thing you burned while attempting to cook? Tacos

2. Describe yourself in three words? Tall, skinny, geek

3. How long does it take to get ready for your day? About an hour, but I'm slow

4. Favorite place to blow $50? Best Buy

5. How many people have you thought were "the one"? Just one

6. What is something that turns you OFF from the opposite sex? Bad kissing

7. What kind of car do you drive? 1996 Grand Prix SE

8. What's in your CD player right now? What's a cd? OH, you mean MP3, right... Christmas music

9. What celebrity would you have coffee with? John Cusak

10. What celebrity would you NOT have coffee with? Nicholas Cage

11. What kind of toothpaste do you use? Arm and Hammer

12. What time do you usually go to bed? 11ish

13. Last movie you saw? Serenity... w00t!

14. Last TV show you watched? The Simpsons

15. Who is your best friend? I don't know...

16. Who in your family do you best get along with? My mom

17. Who do you have a crush on? Real people or celebrities?

18. What time is it right now? 6:31 PM

19. Are you planning a vacation/travel? No, afraid not

20. When/Where was the last time you traveled? Does Chicago count? I was there a few weeks ago

21. How many times have you been in love? Twice

22. How old will you be in 10 years? Almost 34... ouch...

23. Where do you see yourself in 10 years? Hopefully heading up a photography program a some college... maybe Purdue...

24. Sinful snacking weakness? Slim Jims

25. Roller Coasters? Oh hell yes!

26. Ever run out of gas? Yes, once was my fault, once was somebody else's

27. Ever been on a train? No, I don't think so

28. Ever been on a blind date? Not really

29. Ever been to Europe? Nope

30. What would you do if you could be the opposite sex for one day? Play with the boobies... yeah, you have to play with the boobies... Maybe see what my looks could get me

31. Would you tell anyone it was really you? I don't know

32. Ever been arrested? Not arrested...

33. Have a crush on anyone you work with? Sure

34. What is something you believe in? That things will work out... you always have to go with your gut

35. What is something you fear? Dying alone

36. There is no Q36

37. What is the worst physical pain you have ever experienced? Breaking my arm, or my fingers... one of those two

38. What is your favorite television show? ER, Scrubs, there's too many... I like TV

39. Ever photoshopped yourself to look better in a picture? No

40. Tell us something about your childhood? I've blocked too much of it out

41. What would it cost you to flash the person next to you? $100

42. Best time to catch you in a good mood? That's tough, but most likely in the morning after I've had coffee

43. If you could be anything for one day, what would it be? Haha, I'm not going to answer that

44. Most prized possession? Probably my camera and my negatives

45. Would you ever sell it/how much? For the camera, as much as it's worth. The negatives... never

46. What is one of your pet peeves? Bad drivers

47. Favorite kind of ice cream? The good kind

48. What song are you listening to right now? Nothing, watch "Malcom In the Middle"

49. If you could sucker punch one person who would it be? Haha, again, I'm not going to answer that one

50. Would you like to tell us one of your secrets? I would, but I'm not allowed to say anything

My Dreams Really Are Cruel

I have had too many dreams lately that are pissing me off. It like my mind can't help but want to show everything I can't have. It's like I'm on the outside looking in (which is true in this case). I wish it was the other way around where my good dreams came true and the bad ones didn't, but I guess I'm not that lucky.

The semester is essentially over. I have a little grading still to do, and I need to write an artist statement for my photo project, but other then that, its relaxing until January 2nd. I don't know what I'm going to do over break. I might spend some time in the studio and the lab working, maybe I'll just play games all break...

I could start working out, although I don't know if the personal trainers are going to be at the Corec over break, so I may just start when school starts. I'm going to get buff and even more handsome then now. :oP

I'm going to be interviewed for Tipp-C on Tuesday. I don't know that it's REALLY because they want to interview as it's more of a thing where they can't find anyone else. That's fine with me because the stuff I've been working on recently hasn't been my best work, but at least this gives me some exposure and can lead to more in the future.

Anyway, that's all for now. Here's to hoping that I start having some good dreams... and that THOSE come true...

Don't Waste Your Time With This

1. Do you still talk to your first boyfriend/girlfriend? No

2. What should you be doing right now? Not much

3. What kind of music did you listen to in elementary school? New Kids On the Block... HELL YEAH!

4. What is the best thing about your day today? Finished grading final portfolios

5. Do you enjoy Texas hold'em? Yes

6. Are you against same sex marriage? No

7. Have you been on a date in the past week? Yeah, sure, kinda

8. Have you ever kissed someone you dont like? I don't think so

9. Quote an Nsync song lyric? Bye, bye, bye

10. Are most of the friends in your life new or old? New

11. Do you own any furniture from Ikea? No

12. Do you like your parents? Yes

14. What state/country are you from? Indiana

15. Tell us about the last conversation you had? It was about cookies, cupcakes, and back massages

16. Where do you see yourself in one month? Starting to teach 3d design... NO!

17. What is your favorite smell? There's a lot of them

18. Do you consider yourself a clean person? Eh, somewhat

19. What is the time and the outside temperature at the moment? 10:59 AM and 29 degrees (real feel = 15 degrees)

20. What are you doing tomorrow? Going to my family Christmas party

21. Have you ever gone to therapy? No, but I probably should

22. Have you ever Played Spin the Bottle? I can't remember, but for some reason I think I have

23. Have you ever Toilet Papered someone's house? Yes

24. Have you ever liked someone but never told them? Duh, I think that's the way with everyone

25. Have you ever gone camping? Yes

26. Have you ever had a crush on your brother's or sister's friend? Yes

27. Have you ever been to a nude beach? No

28. Have you ever drank jack daniels? Yes, too much in fact

29. Have you ever had sex on the beach? I've made out on a beach

30. Have you ever had a stalker? Possibly

31. Have you ever been in love? Yes

32. Have you ever gone skinny dipping? No

33. Have you ever laughed so hard you cried? Yes, don't forget the pain too

34. Have you ever gone to a party where you were the only sober one? Yes

35. Have you ever been cheated on? Yes, but I was better off

36. Have you ever met one of your myspace friends? Yes

37. Have you ever felt betrayed by your "best friend"? Yes

38. Have you ever lied to your parents? Yes, hasn't everybody?

39. Have you ever been out of the US? Yes, Canada and Mexico, so not that far

40. Have you ever thrown up from working out? No

41. Have you ever gotten a haircut so bad that you wore a hat for a month? Probably

42. Have you ever eaten 3 meals from 3 different fast food places in one day? Yeah, I probably have. I'm that lazy sometimes

43. Have you ever gotten so wasted you didn't remember what was going on? Yeah, kind of, I can't remember

44. Have you ever spied on someone you had a crush on? Define spy

45. Have you ever seen your best friend naked? I've seen a lot of people naked

Music Quiz

• How many songs? 6,731 and counting
  
• Sort by Artist
  First artist: 10 Years
  Last artist: Zyko
  
• Sort by Song Title
  First Song: 'Bout the City
  Last Song: Zora's Domain
  
• Sort by Time
  Shortest Song: John Mayer - "Untitled" (0:00)
  Longest Song: Bill Cosby - "Himself (1:40:00)
  
• Sort by Album
  First Album: 14:59 (Sugar Ray)
  Last Album: Yourself Or Someone Like You (Matchbox 20)
  
• First song that comes up on shuffle: Smash Mouth - "Walking On the Sun"
  
• How many songs come up when you search for "sex"? 54
  
• How many songs come up when you search for "death"? 16
  
• How many songs come up when you search for "love"? 234
  

I would just like to say that this quiz does NOT reflect my musical taste. It's just weird that so many of the songs listed come from the mid-90's. Go figure...

Blah, Blah, Blah

1. What is your occupation? Graduate student and teaching assistant

2. What are you listening to right now? Ella Fitzgerald "Time Alone Will Tell"

3. What was the last thing you ate? Chinese food, sweet and sour chicken

4. Do you wish on stars? Yes

5. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Blue

6. How is the weather right now? Flurries, I think

7. Last person you spoke to on the phone? Julie

8. How old are you today? 23

9. Favorite drink? Powerade

10. Favorite sport to watch? Football

11. Have you ever dyed your hair? Yes, several times

12. Do you wear contacts or glasses? Neither

13. Pets? I miss my puppy

14. Favorite month of the year? October

15. Favorite food? Steak and potatoes

16. What was the last movie you watched? Joyride

17. Favorite day of the year? Thanksgiving

18. What do you do to vent anger? I wish I would hit things (not people), but I usually just
bury it

19. What was your favorite toy as a child? Transformers

20. Hugs or kisses? Both

21. Cherry or Blueberry? Strawberry

22. Do you want your friends to do this back? YES

23. Living arrangements? Alone

24. When was the last time you cried? Probably when my dog was put to sleep

25. What is on the floor of your closet? Dirty laundry

26. Who is the friend you have had the longest? Nick

27. What did you do last night? Played Halo

28. Who inspires you? My mom

29. What are you afraid of? Dying, being alone... dying alone

30. Plain, cheese or spicy hamburgers? Plain

31. Favorite car? Jeep Wrangler

32. Favorite dog breed? German Shepard

33. Number of keys on your key ring? 13

34. How many years at your current job? 4 months

My Last Day

Today is the last day of the semester for me (besides grading). I feel so relieved. Yesterday's final crit was kind of sad. I'm going to miss that class. They were my good class and all did pretty well for their final projects.

Today's class is a different story. They don't have the same kind of strong ideas my other class does. They always seem more interested in just getting the work done instead of actually making good work.

The crit should go fairly quickly today. I'd say and hour and a half tops. I don't want to keep them long... plus I'm ready to move on and start getting ready for next semester.

This semester was a learning experience for me. There were a lot of ups and downs, but I think everything turned out alright. I feel that I've been fairly productive and that I'm starting to realize where I want to go as a photographer. I'm taking the printmaking course next semester which is going to be different for me. It's going to be more focused on "art" and that is something I haven't done in a long time. It will be interesting to see what I turn out.

This is a mercy post. I haven't felt like writing anything in a while, but I felt I needed to update. It's almost over for me, and I can't wait until break starts (which is basically tomorrow).

w00t!

Fly Women and Giant Puppets

This is the kind of nightmares I have.

So I'm taking a nice afternoon nap when I am awoken by this freaking nightmare where I'm trapped in a house populated by giant puppet-zombie thing protecting this woman who lives in the basement. She is using the basement to give birth to her army of other fly women. She doesn't look like a fly... she looks like a woman... a hot woman. Somehow though, I know she's a fly woman. The other weird thing about this is that there a woman is with me helping me out, who looks just like the fly woman.

I end up pulling a tube out of the ceiling which somehow shoots a liquid out that melts all the fly women. Okay, we're still getting started. The woman that is with gets some of the liquid on her, and she starts to melt. OH NO, SHE'S A FLY WOMAN! But she's a good one, so it's ok.

We start to make our escape from the giant mansion, through all of the puppet zombies. They keep trying to stop us, but we just push the over, no big deal. Then they bring out the explosives. You know, the old kind of explosives you would see in Looney Toon cartoons. They keep pushing one plunger after another but keep missing. We finally make it to the front door, where e she and I grab a plunger from one of the puppet zombies and blow the whole thing up. That's when I woke up.

My dreams are fucked up.

Weirder yet... I think I've had this dream before...

Please Forgive Me

Want to write something, can't think of anything to write, therefore, you get the lyrics of the song currently playing.

Please forgive me
If I act a little strange
For I know not what I do.
Feels like lightning running through my veins
Everytime I look at you
Everytime I look at you

Help me out here
All my words are falling short
And there's so much I want to say
Want to tell you just how good it feels
When you look at me that way
When you look at me that way

Throw a stone and watch the ripples flow
Moving out across the bay
Like a stone I fall into your eyes
Deep into some mystery
Deep into that mystery

I got half a mind to scream out loud
I got half a mind to die
So I won't ever have to lose you girl
Won't ever have to say goodbye
I won't ever have to lie
Won't ever have to say goodbye

Yeah na na na na
Yeah na na na na

Please forgive me
If I act a little strange
For I know not what I do
It's like my head is filled with lightning girl
Everytime I look at you
Everytime I look at you
Everytime I look at you
Everytime I look at you

The most amazing christmas light set-up ever!!!

A very cool Christmas light setup. The guy who did this must of had a lot of time on his hands. The music is very good too.

Mirrors:
http://rapidshare.de/files/8002837/christmas-light_33.wmv.html
http://www.megaupload.com/?d=Z7YE4ZHX

Size: 9MB

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Flip out... Like A Ninja

Cuz that's what ninjas do

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Love Songs

I'm in a strangely good mood, and I think it's because of the music I'm listening to. It's all love songs, and I don't mean that kind of cheap, sappy, pop radio crap; I'm talking REAL love songs. Good music is what that is. It's the kind of music you can sit back and relax to. Funny thing is, and this always seems to be the case, it's on random.

I suddenly realized today that... well... I'm almost done.

I've looked at my schedule, and as far as teaching, I'm done. There isn't anything else new to cover in class. The only thing left to do it going to be grading the final exam and the final portfolio, which I don't think is going to be TOO difficult. And my classes; one more photo shoot should do it for Karen's class, and for Elizabeth's class I only have a couple more papers to write. I kind of feel dumb after writing that post the other day stressing out about all of this stuff, because when I took the time to look at it in perspective, there's not much left.

Sometimes I wish I could write about everything that was happening. There is a lot more to my life then I let on, but some issues are more personal then others, and while I don't mind talking about it, it's something I don't think is appropriate for the ENTIRE world to know. I use to write everything down in a real journal, but that became nothing more then a bitch-fest and I don't know what I was accomplishing there.

At least here, I think I may be doing something...

Bloggin' Time

This semester is almost over. Only two more weeks. It's been rough. This whole teaching while taking classes thing is a lot more work then I would have thought it would have been. If it was just classes... fine. Just teaching... fine. But when you combine the two, all of a sudden it's like you have double the work. All kinds of things come up from teaching that you never think about.

Example: study guides.

These things aren't easy to make and of course the students HAVE to have a study guide. It's easy to forget that in being a teacher, you already know everything that you are trying to teach people and your students... don't.

I know things will be easier next semester, even if I am teaching a subject I'm unfamiliar with, just because I will know better how to manage my time. The upcoming break is also must needed. It would be nice to have a day off that is ACTUALLY a day off. There always seems to be something to do.

On to more complaining... I hate winter. I hate snow. We're moving into that time of year and it is not pleasant. I wish it was Fall again (even though it still technically is Fall). I enjoy 65 degree days where there is a nice breeze and only a few clouds in an amazing blue sky. That's gone now and won't return until about next October. Boo.

Is there anything good you ask? Yeah, there is, but I don't want to talk about that...

Anti-cancer Compound In Beer

A micronutrient called xanthohumol is present in beer and according to scientists "is one of the more significant compounds for cancer chemoprevention that we have studied"!

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Survey Again

1. If you could "take back" your virginity from you first partner, would you? No
   
2. Would you prefer the lights on or off during sex? Lights, camera, action
   
3. Do you judge people solely by their musical preferences? No
   
4. Would you make a fool out of yourself in public if it meant you were making your partner laugh? Of course
   
5. Would you ever start a relationship with someone who was still living with an ex for financial reasons? Knowing me, yeah, probably
   
6. Do you need to know everything about someone's past? No
   
7. It is more worth while and satisfying to improve the world or appreciate the world? Appreciate the world
   
8. Do you feel you have a purpose or calling in life? I hope so
   
9. Do you believe that dreams can be messages from a "higher level"? Yes
   
10. Would you rather have a great friend you could share everything with or a great lover you can't really talk to? A great friend
    
11. Is the male or female body the closest to perfection? Women are beautiful
    
12. Should a child who's caught masturbating be punished? No
    
13. Do you like kissing in public? Yes
    
14. Do you have a fetish that you would like to employ in your next relationship? Sure
    
15. Did America really put a man on the moon? I think so, but there is some strong evidence to say otherwise
    
16. Would you date someone significantly (9 years or over) older than you? Maybe
    
17. Generally, in life, what makes you happier? Being with the ones I love
    
18. How well do you handle criticism? Pretty well
    
19. Would you like to date someone a lot purer than you? Been there, done that
    
20. When fooling around with someone, do you sometimes have sexual fantasies about other people? No
    
21. Is it possible for full-figured women to be equally attractive as thinner women? Yes
    
22. You've just met someone incredible while out with friends, and (s)he's been kind enough to cough up a phone number. How long do you wait to call? 3 days
    
23. Do you think the family of a murder victim should have any say in what punishment is given to the murderer? Yes
    
24. Would you have a "happy button" installed on your body, connected to your brain, which would instantly make you very happy when pressed? That could be fun
    
25. Would you rather know everything about your mate, or be regularly surprised? I'd like to know enough, but surprise is good
    
26. We are all human, do you judge someone for a past discretion? Not always
    
27. What is sexiest on a woman or a man? Their eyes
    
28. Would you rather have your dream job or your soul mate for the rest of your life? My soul mate
    
29. Do you consider yourself sexually open minded? Yes
    
30. Should your mate also become your best friend? Yes
    
31. Would you rather marry a virgin or someone experienced? Probably someone experienced
    
32. Have you ever had a true one-night stand? Yes
    
33. Have you ever posed as a nude model while someone sketched/painted/photographed you? No
    
34. Would you prefer good things happened, or interesting things? I like the good things
    
35. Is it better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all? Loved and hopefully not lost...
    

Your sausage for his iPod...

Came across an iPod on eBay, but the seller is only taking sausage as currency...

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Sometime, Somewhere Else

I'm not in the right frame of mind right now. I'm focusing on things that I shouldn't be worrying about. I need to be focusing on work and on school. I have work I should be grading and I have work that I need to be doing for class, but I can't get motivated to do it.

Maybe it's because the end of the semester is near. Maybe it's because Thanksgiving break is just two days away. Maybe is because I haven't been feeling well, but that's no excuse for slacking. Maybe it's because I'm looking for resolve. Maybe it's "photographer's block."

It's frustrating.

Ok, so all of a sudden I'm light-headed and I feel like I'm going to vomit... what the hell? I'm shaking. Where did this come from?

Something For You To Read

I haven't changed my clothes in three days...

I'll probably shower later today (yes, I know it's already 4:30).

Chicago sucked. It was too cold, too far to walk, too many people. We got to the actual presentation 30 minutes before it was suppose to start, and there were NO seats. We ended up having to stand behind a pillar...

I'll say that again, STANDING BEHIND a pillar. I was great HEARING a photographer talk about his work, too bad we couldn't see anything.

After the conference we heading back to the van... only to stop at a coffee shop... randomly... without notice...

You could tell that everyone at this point was just ready to go home, but no, we HAD to get coffee first (and by "we" I mean Karen and Tim). Then, when the bill comes, of course it needs to be separated between 12 people. The guy at the register could only do this on his calculator. This place was not... let's say... "high tech." It took about 15 minutes for everyone to pay their bill, but during this time, Karen and Tim were already out the door and heading to the van, leaving the 10 people still inside paying behind to catch up... in the cold...

I know this doesn't sound all that bad, but when you didn't want to go in the first place, every little thing just makes it worse. To top it all off, I am still in pain from the chest thing, and I forgot to bring my pills.

Pain the whole way home...

We got back at about 12:30 (compared to being home an hour earlier had we not stopped for coffee).

I'm all for being a photographer and a teacher, but really, was this trip even necessary?

So Yeah

I changed hosts for my website, and I'm having some trouble getting it back up and running. In the meantime, my blog is going to be the front page and everything is kind of "offline" until I can get it fixed.

I mean, is it really a big deal? Most people only read my blog anyway, who cares about the rest...

Right?

Meditation can boost your gray matter

Meditation alters brain patterns in ways that are likely permanent, scientists have known. But a new study shows key parts of the brain actually get thicker through the practice.

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Great Incomes for Artists and Photographers

Photographers and Artists have been starving for a long time, mostly because they do not know how to market - and those that do, well, we hear about them after they die. This site gives Artists and Photographers the chance for good money now instead of waiting - I thought It was great!

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High School Confidential

1. Where did you graduate from and what year? William Henry Harrison High School, 2000
2. Did you have school pride? No
   
3. Was your prom a night to remember? No, I didn't go
   
4. What was your favorite song you danced to the night of prom? I didn't go, remember
   
5. Do you own all four yearbooks? Yes
   
6. Do you remember the first CD you ever bought? The first CD I ever got was Aerosmiths's "Big Ones." The first CD I ever bought was Green Day's "Dookie."
   
7. What was your favorite movie in highschool? Trainspotting
   
8. What was your number one choice college? Purdue University
   
9. What radio station did you jam out to in highschool? 95.7 the Rocket
   
10. Were you involved in any organizations or clubs? Art Club
    
11. What was your favorite class in highschool? Photography
    
12. Would you say you've changed a lot since highschool? Yes, definitely
    
13. What do you miss the most about it? Absolutely nothing
    
14. Your worst memory of highschool? All of it
    
15. Did you have a car? Yes
    
16. What were your school colors? Orange and blue
    
17. Who was your favorite teacher? Ms. Lascowski and Mr. Schilawski, two really hard names to write...
    
18. Did you own a cell phone in highschool? No
    
19. Did you leave campus for lunch? No
    
20. Were you always late to class? No
    
21. Did you ever have to stay for Saturday school? No
    
22. Did you ever ditch? No
    
23. When it comes time for the reunion will you be there? Probably not
    

Costochondritis

So that's what's wrong with me...

My ribs are messed up, which is messing with my breathing, which is messing with my bronchitis. I went to PUSH today, and they've got me doing a couple of different things. I'm using an inhaler and taking both Zyrtec and ibuprofen. The doctor thinks it should take about 2-3 weeks before my chest starts feeling better, but I got the impression that I am going to have to continue with the inhaler and Zyrtec indefinitely.

Along with that, no physical exercise. I'm not suppose to do any strenuous work because it might re-aggravate whatever caused this in the first place (it's between working on my installation and a viral infection).

So far, I'm not feeling any better. It's still hard to breathe and the inhaler is giving me a headache. I have to go back in two weeks for a checkup and hopefully it will be gone by then.

I don't know what else to say...

UPDATE: I guess this means no personal trainer for about a month.

Wasn't There A Post Before This?

I think a post that I wrote is missing. I'm pretty sure I wrote a small post yesterday, but it's gone now. Maybe I didn't save it or perhaps it was a dream. If anyone knows of this mysterious missing post, let me know.

On to other news...

Actually, there isn't much to say. I went to the Merce Cunningham performance last night. It was alright I guess. I started having some back pain right before it started, and I was in pain the whole time, so I wasn't really getting into it.

I came home and couldn't sleep. Too much pain, too much on my mind.

I'm suppose to watch the installation gallery tonight. That is probably not going to be too interesting because I don't think too many people are going to come, but I could be wrong.

I'm in office hours right now. I don't even know why we have to do this because no one ever shows up. It's really a waste of time. I'm thinking about not scheduling hours anymore and just telling my students to set up individuals appointments if they need to see me, that way I'm still accessible, but at the same time I don't have to be here.

This is where I would be typing more if I knew what I wanted to say, but I'm still trying to figure out what's going on and how I am feeling about certain things. I've been one to always go with my gut feeling and try not to think rationally about things. There is always a moral dilemma when thinking rationally. It's not that I don't have morals, but sometimes morals get in the way of doing what feels right.

Dammit...

People Are Outside Screaming

And I'm inside watching football.

It's going to be a long night. I haven't been sleeping well the last couple of nights. I hate that. At least I get a chance to sleep in a little bit tomorrow, although I'll probably be up around 7 or 8, but I doubt I'll sleep well tonight either.

I went in and spoke with someone at the Corec about getting a personal trainer, and I'm pretty sure I'm going to do it. It costs about $200 for a 9 week program. While I technically have the money, I would like to save a little more before I go ahead and start the program, especially since Christmas is not far away.

I was thinking that I may just wait until next semester to start, but then I'm afraid everyone will come back from the holidays, thinking they need to loose weight, and I really don't want to deal with tons of people being at the Corec. So, I don't know, we'll see how much money I have left after I get my bills paid.

...

My chest hurts...

It's hard to breathe...

I don't like this...

The Luckiest

Damn you Ben Folds...

Questions With No Answers

I know what I want to write, but I don't know if I should. The title really says it all. I'm at a loss right now.

I want to improve myself. I need to stop drinking. I need to start eating better and exercising. I need to... um... stop doing some other things. I need to start budgeting my money better. I need to start working harder on both my school work and my teaching.

I need a change in my lifestyle.

Why am I saying all this? Well, to quote my friend Earl, "It's Karma. Do good things and good things will happen to you."

I feel that if I want to get the things out of life that I want, I need to start living a better life. That's not to say that I'm not a good person, but I really just want to start living a "healthier" life.

Maybe if I do that, I might just get some answers that I'm looking for...

Eh, I Don't Know, Something Happy-Like

The installation is over!

It's all done, and it seemed like people enjoyed my piece. Awesome!

There was a good turnout, and I thought everything came together pretty well. I say we did a good job. Hooray for us!

As a side note... Who the hell knocks on someone's door at 3:30 in the morning? I'm lying in bed, all nice and cozy like, when I hear a knock at the door. I get up to answer it, but since I have no peep-hole, I have to ask who is there. They don't answer. I ask again, and then I hear them bolt off down the stairs and out the door. Don't know who it was...

That is annoying and pisses me off a little.

Only Time Will Tell

Overload...

Yeah, I know, I've said that before.

The installation opens tonight at 6:00 pm. I went to the space yesterday to finish setting up my piece when, of course, something went wrong. The projector I was using broke and wouldn't turn on. I had to go swap it out for another one this morning. This projector is HUGE and weighs a lot, so it sucks carrying this thing to campus and back.

When I got back to the space with the new projector, I set everything up, and then the DVD player wouldn't work. I had to run home, grab mine, and use it. That sucks. But everything is set up now and I am done (except I still need to hang my artist statement).

This hasn't been a good week. I am hoping now that since this class is done, things are going to get better. I can rest and not worry so much.

I don't feel like writing this, but I wanted to update. Even though it's done, it's not over until after the opening tonight.

I just want this day to end...

*Blowing Wind Out My Mouth

I'm bored.

I don't REALLY have a whole lot to do. Yes, I know I need to work on my installation, but I will finish that up tomorrow. I'm in a bit of a funk right now. I want to go out and do something, but I'm not motivated enough to get up and do something about it.

I'm lazy.

To top it all off, I have to be up in the morning as usual, so I need to get to bed soon. I hate trying to sleep when I feel like this. It takes me forever to finally get to sleep, and then I feel like I wasted all of that trying to get to sleep when I could have been doing something.

I'm not tired.

I guess I'll just do what I usually do. Drink a beer, lie in bed, and wait until morning.

I'm pathetic.

So That Sucks

Who would have thought that sanding the wall BEFORE painting would have been a bad thing?

It's turns out that the wall that I'm working with in the installation space has so many layers of paint that it would have been better to have just left it on there. I sanded it down the best that I thought I could have, but nope, as I started painting, the previous layers started to peel away, making my wall look like shit.

I'm hoping that once I get the second, and probably even thirds coats done, it won't look bad, otherwise this could be a big-time "oops."

Edited For TV

I hate is when movies are edited for TV. I'm watching "Scary Movie" right now, and they have cut out all the good part, even the ones that deal with moving the plot forward. How is someone supposed to follow the movie if they have never seen the unedited version? It's freakin' annoying. I'm almost tempting to put the movie in and watch it... that is... if I really cared about the movie, because lets face it...

Scary Movie is lame...

Some People Will Work, Some People Will Not

1. ARE YOU OVER 18? Yes
2. WHAT IS THE WALLPAPER ON YOUR CELLPHONE? Some clouds
3. DID YOU GET ENOUGH SLEEP LAST NIGHT? Not really, but that's alright
   
4. FIRST THING YOU THOUGHT ABOUT THIS MORNING WHEN YOU WOKE UP? It's going to be a long day
   
5. WHAT DO YOU HAVE HANDY AT YOUR BEDSIDE? My alarm clock
   
6. WHO'S THE LAST PERSON YOU KISSED? Kissed in what way?
   
7. GRILLED OR FRIED? Fried
   
8. WHAT MAKES YOU UNIQUE? My fingerprints
   
9. ARE YOU AFRAID OF THE DARK? Not really
   
10. FAVORITE HANGOUT? Pete's :o(
    
11. 3 THINGS YOU CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT? My computer, my camera, and love
    
12. FIRST THING YOU WILL BUY IF GIVEN 1 MILLION DOLLARS? A new car!
    
13. FAVORITE SONGS WHEN YOU'RE SLEEPING? Anything jazz
    
14. WHAT ARE YOU AFRAID OF? Dying alone
    
15. ARE YOU A GIVER OR TAKER? Giver
    
16. WHAT ARE YOUR NICKNAMES? Dan the man, hot photo TA, dork
    
17. WHAT IS YOUR DAD'S MIDDLE NAME? Blondell
    
18. MOST RECENT MOVIE THAT YOU WATCHED? The Transporter
    
19. STUCK ON A DESERTED ISLAND & COULD HAVE ONLY ONE KIND OF FOOD FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE, WHAT WOULD IT BE? Probably pizza
    
20. FAVORITE T.V. COMMERCIAL? I really like the Capital One commercials where the fat guy keeps getting abused by David Spade... those are great
    
21. FIRST THING YOU'LL SAVE IN A FIRE? Assuming there are no people or animals around... my computer with my MP3 collection on it
    
22. YOUR EYE COLOR? Brown
    
23. WHAT ARE THE THINGS YOU ALWAYS BRING? Wallet, watch, keys, cell phone
    
24. WHAT DO YOU USUALLY DO WHEN THE CLOCK TURNS 7 AM? Get up and get in the shower
    
25. THE COLOR OF YOUR BEDSHEET? Black, white, and gold... Purdue colors
    
26. WHO DO YOU WANT TO MEET? That's tough...
    
27. HOW'S LIFE TODAY? Fine at the moment, but I know it's going to get worse by the end of the day. Damn installation...
    

I Can't Sleep

I know it's only like 12, but I have to be awake in about 6 hours, and I can't sleep. There is a lot on my mind right now and I can't stop thinking about it, thus, preventing the sleep that I so want right now.

I finished grading my first classes midterm today and all I can say is "ouch." It is painful how badly they did. I feel horrible. I can't decide whether to give them a chance to make it up or just let it be how it is. I mean, if they didn't study, then it's their fault for doing so poorly, but at the same time, I never went over the reading material in class with them on any kind of "deep" level, so I might be at fault too.

I'm also worrying about the installation piece that opens in less then two weeks. I have to help with promotion on top of actually getting the work up and going. It's going to come together, I know it will, but I can't help but feel stressed out about it.

Karen's class is like the one thing I'm NOT worried about. I feel like I have a strong idea working there, and my shooting is starting to come together. Plus, I know Karen, and she will like anything I do. Hell, she gave me an "A" in a class where she never even saw my final project.

I don't know if I'm looking forward to the semester ending or not. I've had a good semester, and I think next semester will be fun too, but I'm afraid of what next semester (and following semesters as well) hold for me in teaching. I don't want to teach 3D Design for the next two years, but I feel that may be the case. I want to teach. I want to teach photography. If things turn out like I think they might, is it really worth staying at Purdue?

See, this is why I can't sleep...

Web Art, I Think

I just came across this site. I think it's a web art project, but I could be mistaken. It could be some kind of new viral marketing thing. It's interesting, check it out...

EDIT: Make sure you scroll around, and have your pop-up blockers turned off.

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DRUNK MONKEYS!

OMG! I LOVE IT!

p.s. This is on TV right now...

It's Raining, For Like... EVER

So it's suppose to rain everyday for then next week. Ain't that great!?

I've got a lot of grading to do this weekend, and I still need to get working on my installation. I will hopefully be picking up my projector on Monday morning, that way I can start working to see if my idea is going to work at all. It's going to be an older projector, but I still think it should work out, we'll see.

I am also going to work more on my sign language project early next week as well. I have a new model who should work out for getting me some stronger images. I am confident in this idea turning out the way I want it, and there isn't a whole lot of work left to do.

I did a really good job on my midterm journal thing for 494T. I got a 58 out of 60, which is awesome because I was really worrying about that class after we turned in our first paper. I guess is wasn't such a bad thing to ask Elizabeth to be on my committee. w00t!

Oh Yeah...

I finally found my pocket knife! WooHoo!!!

I Hate Art

Then why am I in art school?

It's not that I hate art, but I do get fed-up with the notion that art has to have thousands of levels of deeper meaning. Why can't art be simple in it's concept? This has always been my biggest issue with the art world; it's not good unless means something.

The piece that I am working on for installation is simple: a video projection played back on a wall. There's not a whole lot to it. The concept is simple too: restoring a wall to perfect condition. That's it. I presented this idea to my class tonight, and my teacher pretty much shot it down, just like every other idea that I've told him. I don't know what to do to make this guy happy. Every idea that I've given him, he always says the same thing, "That's interesting."

Give me some real feedback!

I get that he wants me to think about my ideas, but once I have an idea that I like, I usually like to follow through with it. I don't want to change it just because someone thinks it needs more "thinking through." If the idea is going to change, it's going to happen in the process of doing it, not during the planning stages. I don't know about other artists, but that's how I work.

I come up with an idea, begin work on it, and then finish it. If the idea changes, it's because of something that happened during the actual creation of the work, not in the planning stages. That is exactly what happened with my first idea (well, second idea, he killed my first one).

I presented this idea about using sound to illustrate the same idea common with photography; stopping a moment in time. I was going to present photographs with their "sound equivalent." He liked the idea, but he started dissecting it, getting rid of the photography aspect all together. Fine, I can deal with that. Then, he started to think that I need to bring outside sounds into the space that react with it. Ok, he's pushing it a little, but I'll see where it's going. Finally, he thought I need to find a way to relate the sound to specific pieces of the wall within the space.

Come on!

It went from a simple concept to something that I just didn't think was interesting anymore. So, I went to the space to try and come up with a new idea, and I did. It's something that I think would be really interesting and makes sense...

Not to him, he's already trying to change it around to try and make it something different. Changing the scale of the piece, placing it in different areas, etc. Grrrr!

I had told people about my idea in class earlier, and they all seemed to like it. But after he talked about it, there seemed to be a shift in opinion. Now I feel like I need to come up with yet ANOTHER idea.

This class is really pissing my off...

I Had A Cool Title For This Post, But I Forgot It

The weather is nice, although I could see my breath this morning, which indicated that it MIGHT have been just a little too cold.

I don't know why I'm writing anything right now; I don't have much to say. My mind is a complete blank, but I'm compelled to write something.

Viral marketing campaign.

Doesn't make much sense, does it? Microsoft has been doing a lot of these lately to hype their products, specifically Halo 2 and the Xbox 360. These are cleaver ways of getting people involved in the process of advertising. ILOVEBEES was the first they did for Halo 2, and there have been several others since them. It was cool at first, but it has lost a lot of it's interest now that EVERYONE is doing it.

So there was something. Purdue lost again. This season is basically over. I doubt we will make it to a bowl game. We would have to win all of the rest of our games to even be qualified, let alone invited to one. I guess the streak is over.

I think my idea for my installation class is really coming together. The idea that I had involving sound wasn't going where I wanted it to, so I trashed the idea and started fresh. The piece that I'm working on now deals more with the actual, physical space and not so much the history of it. If I can get it to come out right, it could be really... neat. But if it looks sloppy, then I'll have lost the appeal. Here's to hoping I can pull it off!

Feng Shui

Ai, ai, ai.

It's strange. I don't know why, but it's strange. It's happening right now. Am I dreaming? Is this really happening?

Maybe it's all true; all of it. One thing is for certain; it happened. Now comes the time that I have to ask myself a question. What do I do next? Is there even anything to do?

This entry is cryptic. There is a lot of meaning behind, but very little at the same time. This is all in my head. I'm thinking again. Too much thinking leads to bad endings. Maybe I work off of instinct?

How do I take the next step?

I'll sleep on it, maybe the answer will come to me. Goodnight.

MIDTERM

My students are freaking out about the midterm, so I'm opening the lab for them to get some work done... RIGHT NOW!

:oP

I'm bored because I'm here when I should be at home. Blah.

YAY for teaching... right?

Weird

I don't care what anybody says, but I'm hot! And I don't mean the attractive like. I mean the temperature kind of hot. I am sweating in my apartment and that sucks. It's hard to sleep when you're hot, so I'm trying to cool down.

I have finally caught up with all my work and I'm taking this weekend to sit back and relax. Sure, there IS stuff I could be doing, but it's not due anytime soon, and I think I deserve a break.

I'll probably spend a good amount of time working on the website and so forth. It needs to get done and the longer that I put it off, I know I'm not going to finish it.

Ok, that's all for now, trying to cool off.

Stay cool!

Procrastination Hack: �(10+2)*5�

A great system for tricking your mind into actually working. Great for all the bored cubicle workers out there.

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I Need To Blog

I woke up this morning, and I feel weird. I don't know what it is, but something seems out of place. Could it be the whole Facebook thing with my students? Or is it the project I'm working on for installation? Maybe it's the pile of work sitting in front of me that I don't want to work on?

I don't know, it could be many things. It could be that I've spent my break so far NOT working on anything. I've all but scrapped my installation idea. I'm not happy with where it is going, so I'M going back to the drawing board. I may spend some time in the installation space today to try and get some new ideas. I haven't picked up any of the reading material that I should be reading; too many words. I haven't written any of my other three journal entries, let alone going back and revising the old ones.

I guess I did wake up this morning and grade my classes work. That's something, right? I was going to work on my website this weekend and get that set up completely, but so far nothing has come from that. I'm in a slump right now and I need to get motivated.

Ahhhhh!

I don't know what to do...

I'm So Awesome... Right?

So I was browsing Facebook tonight, and look at what I found...

facebook
Originally uploaded by therealdriverx.

Art Is Difficult

I'm not sure about my installation. The idea I started with is now far from what I imagined. It's not that I don't like the idea as it stands now, but it's not exactly jumping out at me. There is still time to tweak it, but I need to talk with Charles about the tweaking and see if I can get ANYTHING out of him (he isn't to helpful in the idea department).

A couple of things happened this week. Robin got a new kitty which I met today. Her name is Dot and she is ugly. :oP She's not really, but she sure is tiny. I think she is only about a month old, which explains why she is so small.

The other thing that happened today was that Robin lost her job. The laboratory she was working at closed. That sucks. They didn't even give any of the employees any kind of notice. Today at work, she walked in, they told her that the lab was closing and that today was her last day. That is such shit! She's been trying to get a job at Purdue as a research assistant, which she pretty much got, there is just a matter of doing some paperwork, which is going slowly, but hopefully she will be working again soon.

Fall break started today, and I really want to use this time to catch up on a lot of work. I have a lot to read, a lot to write, and a lot of projects to get moving on.

I guess there is one good thing right now... the weather sure is nice!

Sad

You've probably noticed the post below by now. We had to put down my dog Kara this last Friday. She had cancer and we didn't want her to suffer any longer. We've had Kara since I was in 5th grade, so it's been a good long while. She will be missed.

I am going to Chicago tomorrow for the annual field trip here at Purdue. Of course, I've started getting sick today. Isn't that just my luck? I'm hoping that if I take something tonight, I'll feel better tomorrow and it won't be so bad.

We're having our first critique this week for my graduate photo class. I haven't started on anything yet. I better get to work. I'm still not sure what I would like to do, whether it be the "sign language" project, or something else. I thought it would be easier to combined my installation course and the photography course by making a whole piece and then dividing it between the two classes, but the more that I think about it, the more I don't want to do that.

Other things that make me sad right now is the fact that next semester I won't be teaching photography; I'll be teaching 3-D design. Why, you might ask? Well, there are only two sections of photo being offered next semester, and the other TA gets priority because she has never taken any design course. I, on the other hand, took A&D 105 while I was here, so you know that means I can teach A&D 106, 3-D design. Yeah... that makes sense.

I have never done ANYTHING with 3-D. How the hell am I suppose to TEACH a class how to work with the concepts if I don't even understand them? Guess we'll find out.

My poor, poor students...

R.I.P.

Kara

1991-2005

I'm Happy

I'm really tired right now. I spent the last three hours doing some serious cleaning of the gallery space for my installation class. Damn, I'm in pain.

I was driving today, listening to some music when I realized that I'm happy with what I'm doing now. I started thinking back to the whole Muncie thing, and how miserable I was. I look at where I am now, and I'm happy.

I have a job that I like. I'm doing the work that I want to do, making the "art" that I want to make, it's very good right now.

There are always things that I wish were different, but sometimes I can't change that.

I've been working my ass off, more-so then I did in Muncie, and yet I'm happy. It just goes to show how much doing something you enjoy can really make life meaningful.

The post tonight is not going to be as long as the last few have, simply because I am DAMN tired, and I want to go to bed.

Goodnight to you...

So Help Me

Another weekend gone, and I am sad. These last few weeks have been going by REAL fast. I don't like that. My work week is only four days, so I have a three-day weekend every week. That's cool, right? But it's going by so fast that it doesn't feel like I even get time to relax. I have so much work to do, the sad thing is though, I'm not getting my work done. I mean, I get ENOUGH of it done, but there is so much more I should be doing.

For example, while I did clean my apartment, got some grading done and bought the book I needed for my installation class, there were ten other things I should have done as well. The list could go on forever, but a few examples include; buying groceries, writing one of my many papers, reading one of my many books, working on one of my many projects, etc. You get the idea.

I'm such a procrastinator. I always have been. I get everything done, but not until the lost moment. In my defense, I usually do better work under pressure, but I know that's no justification.

I'm starting to redesign my website around the new look of my blog. It's coming along okay I guess. They don't REALLY look the same, but close enough. I'm still trying to tweak it a little bit more before it's final. I'm going to redo the gallery as well. The way I have it set up isn't working for me. I want it to be nicer, so I'm looking into better ways of displaying it.

Tomorrow is going to be busy. At least, as long as I get off my ass and do some work. Teaching, class, and more class, and don't forget reading, and more reading, and some writing on top of that. Oh yeah, we are also cleaning the installation space all night tomorrow as well. I'm going to be tired.

What else can I ramble on about? I'm sure there is something...

Purdue lost yesterday. That sucked. The Chargers won today. That rocks.

I added some more photos to Flickr. I also put a Flickr bar on the side that shows the five most recent images. So far I've only been putting my cell phone pics on there, but I am going to get around to putting ALL of my images on there, including my portfolio (hence the redesign of my gallery). That's going to be a long process which I probably won't get around to until fall break in about two weeks.

I'm sure you want me to shut up now, but there's a lot on my mind, and I can't afford therapy, and this is the next best thing.

I need to start working on some of my projects, but I'm still not sure what I want to do. I think for the installation class, I'm going to do the project involving sound and pictures. Charles seemed to like that idea, and it's something I've been wanting to work on for a while now and this seems to be the perfect forum.

The other project I'm thinking of involves sign language and the definition of art. It's an interesting idea I came up with about six months ago. There's just a couple of kinks involved. For one thing, I need a "model," someone who knows sign language and I can have access to their hands for a fair amount of time. Secondly, the project needs to be related to aesthetics because that is the "theme" of the photo class this semester. The images I would be taking have to be "beautiful."

I'm either going to use medium or large format. But, along with the images, I want to have a film that plays along with them. It's much more of a gallery piece then a simple project for a class, but I'm always thinking that way. I over think things, it's who I am.

The "Superman" theme is stuck in my head tonight. Maybe I can be a hero...

Movie: Short - "SPIN" via: AtomFilms.com

One of the most amazingly creative shorts I have ever seen. This is incredible! WATCH THIS NOW!

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Writing For the Sake of Writing

Here I am. Sitting in front of my computer, feeling the need to write something before I sleep. I don't know what, but something should come to mind as I type.

There are song stuck in my head, which means I'm going to be singing them all night. It's going to be hard getting to sleep.

Teaching is not hard. Not really anyway. School isn't hard either. Am I just not doing enough, because you would think it should be hard? Maybe things will get tougher later, but right now, not so much. I mean, it's not like I'm not busy... I don't have a whole lot of free time, but the times when I am doing stuff, it's not difficult work.

Elizabeth wants to show my senior project to the class. Crazy. She and I were discussing art related things, and for some reason I wanted her to see my film. After she watched it, she decided that she wanted the class to see it and do some work on it. Is that good? I don't know that I want the whole class to write a paper on MY film. That seems weird, especially since I sit next to these people and talk to them.

I know it sounds strange, but I don't like being put in the spotlight. It's hard not to be when you are the teacher, but when it comes to my own classes, I don't know that I like being singled-out. I'm sure most people feel the same way. I don't think that I'm more special then anyone else, but for Elizabeth to want to show my work and have the class write something on it... it does something to me. I want to be all happy and giddy inside, but I feel bad that I want to feel that way. Is that weird? I think it is.

I've always looked at helping people before myself. Who cares what my feelings are when the people around me don't feel the same way? That's is kind of how I live my life. I want the people around me to feel good, whether I'm happy or not. I know sometimes I should think about myself, but I do get satisfaction from the happiness of others. Life is complicated.

I wrote something for my installation class last week involving one of my favorite memories. I will put it in my portfolio section sometime soon so that everyone can read it. The funny thing was, my group decided to reenact MY memory in artistic expression. Talk about something funny to be a part of. I couldn't stop laughing because I felt so strange. You'll get a better idea of what I'm talking about when you read it. I'll try and get it up tomorrow maybe, assuming I have a few minutes between grading, reading, and writing.

Okay, I've said enough for now. Goodnight...

Animation made in realtime ONLY WITH SAND

Wow! This is some Hungarian guy doing a show at a Korean animation festival. He's using Sand to make animation in REAL TIME. Freakishly beautiful!

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The Greatest Toy Collection... Ever.

Check out this guy's toy collection. It is possibly the greatest individual toy collection of action figures, models, etc... I have ever seen.

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Hot Photo TA

I'm being called the "hot photo TA" by some of my students apparently. This has been confirmed by three sources. This has been overheard at the local bookstore, discussed in class, and discussed with faculty.

Who ever would have thought that I was hot?

I feel weird standing in front of class now. My students; looking at me like a piece of meat. Every time I bend over now, I think my ass is getting looked over. Damn.

It's flattering, but at the same time, it's strange. Maybe it has to do with the whole "power" thing in that I'm their instructor. Who knows? I just thought I would share that.

Dan Rhine... the hot photo TA... hmmm...

Yep

Nick Martin had a party last night as his place for all of the VPA grad students. It was a good ol' time. Esteban was DJing, with his Latin rhythm. I'm going to have to get some music from him. At first, there was only a few of us, but people slowly started to show up and things got going. Dancing, drinking, food, the whole works.

Nien and I walked over there and back. He only lives over on 6th street, so it was about a 20 minute walk; not too bad. We left a little early and the party was still raging.

I spent a good part of the day getting some stuff done. I went and saw Mom this morning and then came back here and did some work on my computer. You may have noticed the new look of my blog. Yeah, I changed it. Also, I am now using Google Ad-Sense. There are ads on the side. If you click on them, I get money, so feel free to help me out!

My main website is also going to get a little bit of a face lift, I just don't know when yet, maybe next weekend. I also went through my closet and cleaned it out some more. I found a couple of things that were missing, so that's good.

Tomorrow, I am going to be watching football and grading my student's first photo projects. FUN TIMES!... not really...

There's more to be done tomorrow as well, but I'm not sure off the top of my head what it is. I'm not feeling well at the moment. I'm going to take something and head to bed.

Why Atheism?

History and the Development of Science and Scientific Naturalism

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http://www.taroyamasaki.com/

http://www.taroyamasaki.com/

A Lot Is Upcoming

I just wanted to let everyone know that there are going to be some serious changes coming to my website. Just a couple of things to note; I'm going to start using WordPress for working on my blog (that way I can keep everything local), there is going to be a complete redesign of both my blog and my website, I have a new webcam that will be integrated into my website, and finally, I started a Flickr account, and I'm going to be using that for both my MOBLOG and my gallery, that way it saves stress on my server and keeps everything nice and organized.

I'm really doing all this to keep everything simple and neat. Right now, my website is based on four different sites, and it makes keeping everything updated a little difficult. With this new strategy, I should be able to keep everything nice, neat, organized, and updated regularly. I hope this transition goes smoothly, but I bet it won't.

This could take a while...

Vanilla Sky

Every time that I watch Vanilla Sky, it really pulls strings in me. A lot of people don't get the real message of the film. It's not about dreaming; it's not about science; and it's not about the risks of the future. It's about love.

The film's message, at least what I see, is about how true love can mean so much to one person that even in death, love is the most important thing in the world. It's a sad movie...

It's sad because, Sofia is the most important thing to him, but as he says in the end, "I'm frozen and you're dead, and I love you." You really feel for him that because of what has happened to him, he can't spend the rest of his life with his true love. That is sad.

I always think about that. The film means a lot to me because, well let's face it, I'm hopeless. Love is important to me, and I would live every moment just to be with the one I love. Even in death, I would want the same thing he had; a never ending dream, spending an eternity with the love of my life.

A lot of people take love and this movie for granted, and that's wrong.

I'm starting to ramble now, but I... I just... this film makes me want... THAT! That love, that feeling... I want MY Sofia...

The Best Screen Capture...............EVER!!!!!!

This has got to be one of the best screen captures I have ever seen......

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I Think This Could Be My New Favorite Website

Crooks and Liars

The 'city' of Louisiana

Video of MSNBC's Keith Olbermann giving an excellent and scathing commentary on government response to hurricane Katrina.

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GRRR

I have the ability to REALLY piss myself off sometimes. I hate not being able to control the world...

I know that sounds like I want to be a dictator or something, but don't take it that way. There are small little things in life that we, as humans, cannot change, and it irritates me sometimes when are start thinking of the aforementioned "little things." These little things IRK me, and I can't stand it. I want to hit a wall and scream out loud.

Stupid, stupid little things...

You Have To Be Kidding Me

Sometimes things happen that you simply CANNOT believe. I am in shock right now. It's almost crazy. What can come out of the most random things is unbelievable. I'm sitting here, with one of the worst headaches of my life, trying to pass the time until my Excedrin kicks in, just surfing the web, and I come across something that I wouldn't even think about in a million years...

Maybe fate is just a series of coincidences...

Sick Sick Boy

So I've been sick the entire weekend. Not fun at all. I think I'm just getting better today, which is the last day of break. Tomorrow I have to start back to class. My students seem to be coming along, but I'm having trouble with my Tues/Thur class because there are TWO classes going on at the same time, which means my students only get half of their time in the lab. That sucks for me because I have to come up with busy work for the other part of the time. I don't like NOT being in the lab. I work best with the students when they can be printing. I'm not good at lecture, my strength comes from demonstration. Once things get going, it should be ok, but right now it's a little annoying.

I haven't been sleeping well either. I wake up at all times of the night. I've been having nightmares and bad dreams non-stop for the last week or so. I'm starting to miss sleep. There's a lot on my mind, and I think that's what making sleeping so difficult. I'm sorry if my thoughts seem a little erratic, but I AM still sick. I started this entry earlier in the day, and I'm only now finishing it (like 6 hours later).

I don't know... there's so much right now I want to write and type, but I can't think of the words to say it. This cold is clogging my head. I can't remember if it's "starve a fever, feed a cold" or vice versa. I could look it up, but where's the fun in that.

This will be an easy week for the most part. Just one class tomorrow, and one class on Wednesday. Thursday will be the same. This weekend there is several things going on. Friday, I might be going to a party. Saturday, my grad advisor is having a dinner party at her house, so I will be going to that. Sunday will just be another Sunday.

Also, on Saturday, I might be doing a photo shoot with my friend's band. It's going to be a quick shoot because of the dinner party, but I might be able to get some stuff done. The band is called Fare Thee Well. These guys are a death metal band. Yeah... I know. It should be interesting, assuming I'll have the time.

What else is there? That one song by the Killers, "Mr. Brightside"... yeah, I don't like it. Don't get me wrong, it's a good song, I just don't like the lyrics.

One Free Minute - Anonymous Public Speech

Call the number, and you are given exactly one free minute of free speech. You're message is played from a 200 watt amplifier and speaker, and also featured on the web for oters to hear.

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22 megapixel camera with built-in 40GB hard drive

the new Hasselblad H2D captures images at 5440 x 4080(22.2MP), has a built-in 40GB hard drive and only costs about $27,000

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Interesting Weird Facts

4 pages of weird odd and interesting facts as well as links to other pages of facts. has a page of weird facts for every state as well. check it out

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Stuff

I went out last night with all of the other grad students. We had a hell of a time! What fun! It's good to be back in school and to start meeting new people. It was also a welcomed break from all of the work that has been mounting. Teaching is hard. There is so much to do and remember that you get lost in what you're doing half the time. Then your students just look at you, wondering what to do. I feel stupid in that moment. It's getting better, so that's good. I should have this teaching thing down by next semester... I hope.

Other things... I'm sick right now. I went and bought some cold medicine (which you have to have a driver's license to buy now, btw). I just took some, which will put me to sleep in a few minutes. I want to feel better.

Bruiser is gone. My sister found somebody to take him, so my puppy is no more. :'o(

There is a website where you can find out what song was #1 on the day you were born. I guess there's a saying that states that whatever song was at the top when you were born shapes the rest of your life. My song is J. Geils Band - Centerfold. The song is about this guy's first love turning out to be a centerfold. I've posted the lyrics too.

Does she walk? Does she talk?
Does she come complete?
My homeroom homeroom angel
Always pulled me from my seat

She was pure like snowflakes
No one could ever stain
The memory of my angel
Could never cause me pain

Years go by I'm lookin' through a girly magazine
And there's my homeroom angel on the pages in-between

My blood runs cold
My memory has just been sold
My angel is the centerfold
Angel is the centerfold

Slipped me notes under the desk
While I was thinkin' about her dress
I was shy I turned away
Before she caught my eye

I was shakin' in my shoes
Whenever she flashed those baby-blues
Something had a hold on me
When angel passed close by

Those soft and fuzzy sweaters
Too magical to touch
Too see her in that negligee
Is really just too much

It's okay I understand
This ain't no never-never land
I hope that when this issue's gone
I'll see you when your clothes are on

Take you car, Yes we will
We'll take your car and drive it
We'll take it to a motel room
And take 'em off in private

A part of me has just been ripped
The pages from my mind are stripped
Oh no, I can't deny it
Oh yea, I guess I gotta buy it!

So how does that shape my life? Who knows, but we'll see if that ever happens.

What song shapes your life?

Sex makes people healthy, cheerful, strong, beautiful and sleepy

It is generally believed that human beings have sex either for pleasure or reproduction. However, the number of people driven with these motivations has been reducing steadily during the recent years. The majority of humans use sex as the most pleasant and available remedy for a whole bouquet of problems.

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I Am Boring Myself Just Typing This Out

1. Do you start the water and then get in or get in and start the water? Start the water before
   
2. Do you read the labels on your shampoo bottle? No
   
3. Do you moan like the people on the Herbal Essences? No
   
4. Have you ever showered with someone of the opposite sex? No
   
5. Have you ever been forced to shower with one of your siblings? No
   
6. Have you ever brushed your teeth in the shower? No
   
7. Have you ever dropped your soap on your foot? Yes
   
8. How old do you look? Younger then I am
   
9. How old do you act? Older then I look
   
10. What's the last song you sang? Lifehouse "Take Me Away"
    
11. Have you recently become a member of anything? Um, I became a teacher
    
12. What are your plans for the weekend? Work on lesson plans
    
13. Do you kiss with your eyes open or closed? Closed, but open every once in a while
    
14. What's the sexiest thing about Condoleeza Rice? The booty
    
15. Are you in love with anyone right now? Yes
    
16. Have you ever said I love you? Yes
    
17. Does anything on your body itch right now? No
    
18. What color is the carpet in your bedroom? Brown
    
19. Have you ever had a member of the opposite sex in your room? Yes
    
20. Who's the sexiest famous woman alive? Come back to that one
    
21. Girls: want to touch the hynie? Yes
    
22. Are you more creative alone, or with others? Alone
    
23. Does every family have a crazy uncle or is it just mine? Yes
    
24. Have you ever smuggled anything in to America? No
    
25. Do you end up making a fool of yourself when you try flirting with someone you really like? Yes
    
26. Does playing the guitar make a girl/guy more attractive? No
    
27. Do you believe that your name fits your personality? I guess
    
28. Do you exercise before you eat in the morning? I should
    
29. Do you live in a city with a good sports team? Yes
    
30. Is it better to be single or in a relationship? In a relationship
    
31. What do you think about the person who responded before you? She's a "lifer"
    

I Just Don't Know What To Do With Myself

Sing it Jack White...

This has been a long week: teaching, taking classes again, lazy sisters, dealing with delivery companies, not to mention other events that have transpired have made this a week to remember, even if I don't want to.

Who thought being a teacher would be hard? I never did (being sarcastic). It's hard teaching beginning photography when I already know everything and I need to realize that my students don't. I feel like I'm going way to fast for them, so I slow down and then I feel like I'm treating them like they are dumb. It's hard finding that balance. It didn't help that one of my classes was canceled because of fumes in the darkroom, so they are now a day behind the other class. Von's didn't have enough books for all of the students either. Yeah, it's been fun.

It is getting better though. I think it's only a matter of everyone getting to know everyone else, and feeling free to ask questions. Monday will be the real test when we process film. If everyone's film comes out properly, that would be great.

MY classes don't seem like they'll be too difficult. That's good. I am a little worried about one class, and it's because a lot of writing is required and I hope I have the time to keep up with that. My "project" classes should be a piece of cake. I think I'm going to work on a couple of projects that I've already developed, now it's just a matter of putting it together.

Week #2 is going to be the real test to how this semester is going to play out. The bullshit is done, now it's time to get on with the meat of class. Am I ready? I sure hope so.

Find Out the Meaning of Your Name

Exactly as the title describes... find out the meaning of your name and the personality profile that goes with it. My name means "God is my judge." That's great... What does yours mean?

ps... only use your first name...

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It's Over...

... and so it goes.

I now know how I feel, and I'm miserable.
I'm depressed.
I'm alone.

Add another broken heart to the checklist.

The worst part is, I should be fighting, but I'm not. I'm sitting here asking myself what good would fighting do? I've been fighting and it hasn't worked, why would it work now? Maybe I wasn't fighting hard enough, maybe this is the time I really NEED to be fighting?

I'm lost and don't know what to do...

OVERLOAD

Of the emotional, mental, and physical kind...

There's a lot going on right now: classes are starting again; I'm teaching, meeting new people; moving to my new place; issues of the heart; issues with money; etc. I'm handling it, but I'm very close to going crazy.

Physically, I'm in pain. My back hasn't been feeling right, and I'm having a hard time being comfortable while I sleep. It doesn't seem to matter what position I'm in, they all hurt. I also have a tooth ache. Thankfully, I have insurance now, so that will take care of a lot of the issues there.

Mentally, I'm worrying a lot. I'm really nervous about teaching. I want to make sure I do everything right and that my students are good. Today was my first class, and let's just say it was rough. I didn't feel comfortable, and I know they could sense it. I said "um" A LOT. I think that if I have a more structured lesson plan, that might help solve it a little. We'll see how that works out tomorrow. I'm not too worried about the classes that I'm taking. School (especially when it's classes that I'm interested in) has never been a problem. I'm confident that I will do well there. I am worried about my time management though. Is it going to be hard dealing with teaching AND taking classes? I can already see myself slacking on one of the two. If I'm focused on class, I'm not thinking about teaching, and if I'm focused on teaching, then class doesn't seem that important. I need to remind myself that I have to be active and keep on top of things. NO PROCRASTINATION!

Emotionally, I'm a mess. It's like a rollercoaster. Everyday is different. I'll be extremely happy and over joyed and then the next day, I'm sad and depressed. Right now I'm depressed. I need some stability in my life. I need to know that at the end of the day, someone is going to be there for me, and right now I'm not sure of that. I feel alone right now (it doesn't help that I AM living alone). I ran into Becca during the graduate convocation on Friday. That brought up a lot of old feelings that I forgot about a long time ago. Seeing her reminded me how much I cared for her, how much I thought I loved her, and how I knew it was never meant to be. I'm sitting here now, and I much as I hate to say it, I see it happening again. The ups and downs, the good and the bad, the love and the torment, it's there again. As much as I want something, I feel I'm never going to have that. It's that one thing in life everyone looks for and can never find. Have I found it? I wish it were so, but that feeling of deja vu is growing stronger, and I can't help but feel like...

I don't know how I feel.